Sorry

Sorry to myself. I seriously promise I will never do the stupid thing again. Hey girl, u are approaching 20 years old, so please use the brain b4 doing anything …somehow, hardly forgive and forget. Forgive myself? Silly isn’t it? Haha, this time, not really related to study, exams nor tension. What is the matter? Just let it be, typing all this all, just wan to remind me not to do the same things again, NEVER!!!

It stirred my soul. For such a long time, I din ponder that deep about myself and struggle so hard to overcome the conflict in myself…Principles and belief , what a great lesson…is it a hint? A hint to wake me up b4 I do more serious mistake?haha, tak boleh tahan this “siao” fellow.

Btw, that isn’t a prob. Just another story of the past, reflect for the future…

BYE

sigh, seriously sighing...  it is lame but i hv to say:"wow, time flies..."

Bye to penang.Talking abt penang, in a  nutshell it is a memorable trip. the feeling of exploring n helping each others is really great. abt the detail i m lazy to type out la, su yuen's note in facebook clearly describes abt the trip. can only be myself  during the holiday, no worries, laugh out loud, talk nonsense...pity human, slaves of academic.

Bye to first college. at first i thought first college is just a place to stay for me. somehow felt a bit berat hati when left there just now. no more eat at dewan makan at sharp 6 pm, no more walk around varsity lake after dinner, no more pakcik icecream, no more knocking at some1's door to kacau...what kind of world is ut?can i adapt it well?every choice has its reason right? i wil surely mis the day v had in first college...

Bye to first year. quite unbelievable i m second year senior in the coming sem(starting of the nightmare).  the momory of first year lingering, it keeps reminding me what mistakes i hv made. really should make some changes.time marches, people change, hope the same wil happen to be.

lastly just wan to say :"hey, "duo luo" holiday, i m coming!!!!"

y start blogging?1 is wan to try the feeling of blogging, 2nd is a bit sien now...this study week is horrible. i counldnt find any1 to talk to coz everybody was busy studying...so typing out my feeling was the only thing i could do...

9.16am

Zzzzzzzzzzzzz, tired…just wan to find something to do besides study to get rid of the sleepiness. But y?it is natural to feel sleepy isn’t?the natural sign asking us to rest, poof. Poor human…no, I should said, poor facing final students, esp pharmacy students

Who can tel me how to than the heavy-semi closing eye lids? The acid lactic accumulated limbs are out of control too. How to trigger the sympathetic nervous system pathway so that the high mood to study can be maintained with alertness? Arh!!!!!!help!!!!!!!y? I really don’t feel sleepy when typing all this craps, but whenever I face the notes, o, just cant tahan(nt all the time la, just more serious in the morning, that is y I m here). Morning is the best time to study isn’t?

Haha, I found myself quite pathetic, the things bother me the most are mainly about study. My ife just circle around the academic, good or should learn to “really kan kai yi dian”. The question perhaps be answered along with the passing time, it wil eventually be discovered. Oh, really should get back to study, should’nt waste that much time” groaning without disease”, haha!

 

9.32pm

What happen ha?really can concentrate well after 5pm today. Feed up, wan to vomit ald. But still got a lot haven’t study. So how har?who can tel me how. Waste so much time after 5 pm

My mood, please come back. I greatly plead u, please come back. Study, study, study!!!!!!!!ARH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!MOOD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

13-4-09 Mon 10am

Bright new day starts^-^! Just do it!poof….how can speed up?can I remember all the things that I read?quite scare liao. Takut, sini masuk, sana keluar. Today feel much better than yesterday, no that moody. May b just as mei hui said, study too fast yesterday, until feel feed up. However, study doesn’t mean can save all the input, especially study until such desperate period.

4pm 24-4-09

Just finish biochem. Wow, I was on the peak of the stress last night. Seriously, never feel like that b4. Erm , it was like the stomach was churning, all the input reflected out, palpitation, a bit gong gong, a bit suffocate… wow, tough, really freaking out. After I hv covered almost all the note, somehow feel empty,, felt lk there was a big hole in my soul n brain. I couldnt find the satisfaction of “emm, ok, everything will be right’. Just felt like study nothing. The facts floated here n there. But I slept at around 2, don care that much although nt really sleepy. That is the consequence of nt memorizing the facts well b4.  Hope the stress wont hunt me for 4 years. Balance point, where r u? focus and don’t care too much abt result may are the remedy.tension doesn’t do any good, please go away.pleaes………….